Discussing Pregnancy with A Mommy To Be: Me!

Deciding to create a comfy corner on the blog to fill with exciting advice, experiences, tips, stories, and anything helpful I come across as I journey to childbirth and beyond has been one of my greatest ideas. This is a place for expectant mothers and mother’s to come and feel empowered and ready to take on the world. Even if you aren’t expecting or a mother just yet, and just starting your research on what it’s like and what you need to know, you’ve come to the right place! Instead of having several tabs open on Google just stop on by and take a seat.

I usually choose a mother or mother to be to interview but this time around I decided to take a seat with myself and answer the same questions I’ve been asking mother’s.

• First and foremost, how does it feel to be growing and nurturing a little human so far?

Pregnancy has been an amazing process for me. It’s true that the first trimester is the worst, that’s where I experienced all my sickness but as I progressed I learned each trimester brings its own aches and pains and new journeys. Aside from that, it’s been an experience to say the least, I still can’t believe in just a few weeks I will be birthing my son.

• How far along are you? What are you having? Tell us a bit about yourself.

For those who don’t know, I just spoiled it in the previous question but I’m having a boy. This is my first child and I will be 8 months in about a week or so. I’ll admit, it’s a bit weird answering my own questions on my blog because I feel like “oh they already know” but I can’t assume. Plus I always like to give info for new readers.

I’m 23, soon to be 24 in May. Me and my son will be sharing a birthday month so that’s very exciting. I consider myself an entrepreneur, creator, and writer with a BA in Psychology from Temple University. I currently work in a school doing Behavioral Health Work. In addition to recently self-publishing my 3rd book I blog here with an intent to Uplift, Empower, & Inspire.

I’m really kind-hearted and genuine in everything I do, in my spare time I write, draw, and paint. Oh and sometimes I binge watch Netflix and play the sims. I love role-playing games, they’re fun.

• How did you feel when you first found out you were pregnant? The emotions are real, how did you react?

To be honest, I cried. I wasn’t expecting my test to be positive I was only about a day or 2 late so I was super nonchalant when I took it. I didn’t have any symptoms besides my regular PMS but I started getting scared when both of my period trackers predicted dates and Aunt Flo didn’t show up on either of those days because if one wasn’t right, the other was. I cried out of fear, I was scared I felt unready I had just moved back home from having my own apartment, I wasn’t secure with working, there were was a lot going on in my life (I can probably write a book on that time and the months leading up to it lol, that’s how crazy it was), and at the time the thought of a baby just added on so much more stress that I was already experiencing. But my mind was made up, I knew I had to handle my responsibility and get myself together.

• So far, what would you say is your favorite part about being pregnant? Or do you even like being pregnant? I know how exhausting it can get, some people just want to hurry up and give birth.

Being pregnant has its ups and downs, the best part would be feeling my son move. Sometimes I thinks he plays tag with me or he could be telling me to stop tapping him as he sleeps but him responding to my touch makes my day. I do want May to hurry and get here because I’m getting to the very uncomfortable stage of pregnancy but truth be told I might miss my belly. But hurting when I walk, the increased heartburn, exhaustion, trying to find comfortable positions to sleep, the feeling of having a baby right under your ribs, plus more, yeah those things I can do without lol.

• Are you scared to give birth? What have been some of your worries so far?

Ahh, I just had this conversation yesterday in my prenatal group session. The thought of giving birth makes me feel both powerful and very nervous. Nervous because I don’t know what to expect and although I can’t go off of anyone else’s experience I love reading and watching labor & deliver stories. I’m just worried about the level of pain and if everything will go smoothly with my delivery and baby. So I’ve just been praying super hard for a complication free labor, delivery, and baby because besides preparing myself that’s all I can do instead of worrying myself to death.

• Did you have any symptoms before you found out you were pregnant? If so, what were they? Do/Did you have any symptoms during early pregnancy or now?

I didn’t have any symptoms before I found out, the only thing out of the ordinary was my left boob had bothered me more than usual and of course my period not showing up. Early in my pregnancy I was really tired and sick all of the time. As of now, almost everything I eat gives me heartburn, I’m back to being tired all of the time, my back hurts 99% of the time, and most times I just feel uncomfortable as he continues to grow because he likes to sit right under my ribs and it’s very very uncomfortable. Also my legs and hips bother me when I walk far distances.

• It takes a lot to raise a child, go to work, and do whatever else it is that needs to be done. But Mommy’s also want to have fun every now and then. How do you plan to juggle life, work, and raising a new baby? Can we even plan that far ahead or do you think it’s something we’ll learn as we go through the process?

Given the fact that I’m not a person who goes out often, even before I got pregnant this won’t be a hard task for me. I have a great support system and his father is just as excited for his birth, so if I did want to go out I don’t believe I’d have a problem. Juggling tasks may be difficult in the beginning but I’m sure I’ll find my way, just have to take the days as they come.

• I feel like self-care is really important, especially for expecting mothers. What kind of self-care techniques do you use to refrain from becoming overwhelmed with growing a human and daily life? Most importantly, what do you do to relax and get your mental together?

Self-care is important to me but it doesn’t take much for me to center myself. Most days I’ll listen to music, self-reflect, binge watch Netflix, or just do things I enjoy. My job can be overwhelming so when needed I’ll take a mental health day and stay home. Me blogging and answering these questions right now are a form of self-care for me. Most importantly, I listen to my body, when I need to rest, take a break, go to sleep, etc. I do so.

• How do you think the transition will be? Going from being someone’s child to someone’s parent.

I have some experience with children and caregiving from family members, prior work positions, so I don’t think it will be that hard to transition as the transition already starts before you give birth. A lot of things I’ve endured and experienced has subconsciously prepared me to be a mother.

• Did/do you have any food cravings?

In the beginning I wanted hot wings all the time, then it shifted to ice cream cakes, ice cream, pizza, lasagna, all things I shouldn’t be eating. But food is just way too good, I swear it tastes even better when you’re pregnant.

• Reflecting back on the person you were in your teenage years and even before pregnancy. How would you say getting prepared to be a mother has changed that?

Pregnancy has changed my outlook on a lot of things, relationships, life, work. Overall, it has been an eye opener, you start to see things for what they are and what they could/should be. I start putting myself first indefinitely as its not only me I have to worry about now, but a smaller and more fragile human being. My responsibilities and priorities have shifted so my mindset has shifted in several areas.

• When did you announce to the world that you were pregnant?

I waited until I got my first ultrasound at 12 weeks. I wanted to make sure everything was okay and that’s also when it became real to me, seeing that there was really a baby inside of me.

• What do you think the hardest thing about motherhood will be?

This is a hard one even for me, I would probably say not being able to shield my son from the evils of the world as he grows. I can prepare him to the best of my ability but its scary out here, especially for black boys and men. I doubt that I will because I have confidence in my mothering skills, but I also never want to feel like I’ve failed him in any way.

• Do you have a birth plan (natural, medicated, etc.)?

I want to go natural but it’s something I will play by ear, meaning it depends on my pain level and tolerance and how things go once I go into labor.

• We all worry and motherhood increases that worry 10x. What’s your biggest worry about your child’s future? And as a mother, what’s your biggest fear about the journey of motherhood?

As far as my child’s future, I’m building the foundation for him now to ensure he has a great future. My only hope is that he grows up and makes good decisions for himself. When it comes to motherhood, I’m confident that I’ll be a good mother but the fear of the unknown is definitely a thing. Children are unpredictable just as life is.

• One thing you never had that you want for you kid/kid(s) if you choose/want to have more in the future?

I never went without growing up and I want my children to be the same way, I always had what I needed. Of course I want more for my children, so I want them to have much more, I want them to explore the resources around them. Play sports, play instruments, learn a different language, it’s my goal to ensure that they aren’t hindered in any way and are educated on several things.

• How important do you think it is for new mothers and mothers in general to have support through pregnancy and motherhood?

Support is very important! I couldn’t imagine not having a support system because pregnancy is not something anyone should have to go through alone so I tip my hat to the mothers who do go through it alone. This is a timeframe of many emotions, fears, questions, aches and pains, physical changes, it’s a lot to endure. Women are tested in their mental, spiritual, and physical well-being during pregnancy so support is crucial.

• Did you have an idea of what being pregnant would feel like? How has that changed?

I had no idea, I always wondered; Whenever someone I knew got pregnant I always asked “How does it feel?” It was a foreign experience, something I heard about but of course knew nothing about in regards to what it actually felt like. So my perception hasn’t necessarily changed, I just know how my own experience feels.

• Would you say your relationship has changed with your partner/baby’s father since finding out you were pregnant?

In some instances, yes. In some areas we became closer but I feel it’s a given that things will change as you transition from dating to now having to raise a child together. We’re still journeying through and taking things day by day. We disagreed on a lot but learning to communicate and compromise has helped.

• Do you find it weird when people touch your belly?

Not really a little awkward at times but not unless it’s a stranger, then that would be weird lol.

• You’re in a crowded store with a full cart and your baby starts throwing a tantrum. What do you do?

Try to calm him down using techniques that he likes while trying to figure out why he’s throwing a tantrum and handle it accordingly.

• How do you plan to bond and strengthen your relationship with your baby? Do you do any bonding now while he/she is in the womb?

I rub my stomach and get him to respond to my touch and I talk to him. When he’s born he’s getting smothered with tons of love he may get sick of me to be honest.

• Do you plan to breastfeed, bottle-feed, or both? Why or why not?

I plan to breastfeed since that’s the healthier way to go. I’m open to formula only if it’s necessary but I want to breastfeed.

• Craziest or funniest thing you’ve googled so far about your pregnancy or pregnancy in general?

I’ve googled so many things I’m not even sure what I would categorize as the craziest or funniest to be honest.

• Anything else you want to share about pregnancy or motherhood? Advice, tips, etc.?

Take it easy, enjoy the experience and make the best out of your pregnancy. There will be days where you look and feel a mess and that’s normal. There will be days where you feel sad for no reason, you will probably cry at the drop of a dime but it’s all apart of the process. Pregnancy is a beautiful thing if you take the time to think about what you and your body is doing.

Be sure to check out my interviews with other mommy’s and mommy to be’s!

Related Post:

1. Why Close Relationships May Change During Pregnancy.
2. A Letter To My Black Son
3. Bonding With Your Baby While in The Womb

What’s New? 
Aside from the latest blog post that are waiting to be read, I have published my third book! If you’ve kept up with the blog then you’ve probably read the snippets. They are no longer available but the feedback has been nothing but good. The Key To My Brother’s Heart – Kennedy’s Reign is now available in electronic and paperback editions. It’s available electronically on Barnes & Noble and Amazon Kindle as well as paperback on Amazon.

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Thanks for reading, Be Blessed & Stay Humble. As always Choose You Always!

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