“There is a big difference between being responsible for ourselves and blaming ourselves”
Happy Monday and welcome back to the blog! Life happened last week and I had to skip over a few days but guess what? I’m back on track and ready to roll bringing you some motivation today to make the right choices in life. Are you taking responsibility over your life and the choices you make? Take a look at this video below and I promise it will make you reconsider whether you are.
First things first, you are responsible over your life, everything is a choice. If you are at a certain place in life that you may not necessarily like, if you are struggling and things aren’t going the way that you’d like, it’s all a choice. There are two paths you can take in life, the right and the not so right. I won’t say wrong because everything we go through we are meant to go through, it was all written before we made our appearance here on earth.
From a religious/spiritual standpoint God and/or the universe will give you signs to go one way and often times we choose the opposite. Both will allow you to go that way and you will have to endure and go through whatever is there because that’s the path you chose. It’s a choice whether you chose it unconsciously or consciously. Often times we like to throw the blame when things are going wrong in life, “it’s because of work”, “it’s because of school“, “it’s because of this“, “it’s because of that“. You have to learn to take responsibility over your choices. At some point in life you made a decision that led you to where you are in the present. Some like to say “I wish I would have received a sign letting me know what to do” 9/10 you did. I can only speak from experience and many times I have been guilty of asking for signs and ignoring them once they were smack dead in front of my face. Yes, sometimes life happens and you aren’t in control of something that takes place, you don’t have a choice. Sometimes you can’t make a choice and that’s life and things are just going to happen to you but many times choices are being made and those choices will have an effect. So if you even think about throwing the blame full force, don’t, because you probably had a role in getting there even if that role was small. I’m not encouraging you to self-blame either but taking responsibility in knowing the part you played to get there is important, but recognize that and work to change things, don’t beat yourself up over it. Other people will sometimes have a role just as big as yours for where you are in life and sometimes you will have a role in theirs.
“We can’t change the outcome, we are challenged to change ourselves“
– Viktor Frankl
Everything is a lesson to be learned from and whether you learn from that lesson is a choice, nobody can make that decision but you. If you continue to ignore that lesson then you are going to keep encountering that same problem. My message here is to be mindful when you are making decisions because you have no idea when that path you just chose to walk on is going to end, it could be tomorrow, the next day, next week, next year, or two years from now. There’s no telling, so be mindful because those choices you make can have a long lasting effect over your life. If you don’t like where you are in life work to change it, that change may not happen overnight it may take a while and you may become upset and frustrated throughout the process but even the littlest of progress, is still progress. Most times situations are meant to make us stronger but that’s if and only if you walk away from that lesson knowing not to make the same mistakes twice. You are where you are because of your choices and decisions, no more blaming or playing victim, it’s time to take full responsibility and be the change you want to see. Be aware that taking responsibility is all that you can do, you can’t control the results of your actions or how someone reacts to what you do or say. It’s important to hold that power of self and being able to say “I could I have done things differently but now I know for next time” but it’s also important to know your limitations. Otherwise you will spend time stressing and wasting time/energy taking responsibility over things you never had control over to begin with. Grow through what you go through.
“Make the best use of what is in your power, and take the rest as it happens.”
So how do you take responsibility over your life?
- Eliminate blame and excuses.
- Choose happiness always, don’t let your struggle periods bring you down. Be grateful for the things that you do have.
- Listen to yourself when you speak. Don’t be afraid to put yourself in check.
- Remember there is not one right or wrong way, but simply different ways of being (there is not only one right way or one correct path). There are many ways to do most things, just as there are many ways to live our lives. Having a difficult experience or being at a tough spot in life doesn’t mean we’ve necessarily done anything wrong; it means we are on a tougher road to learning in that moment.
- Change your perspective and shift your energy. If you notice you are spending a lot of time punishing yourself it is up to you to direct that energy in a positive direction.
- Ask yourself questions such as: “What do I want to learn from this?” and “How do I want this to be different in the future?”
- Be good to yourself, speak to yourself with kindness, ask yourself if you would speak to someone you care about the way you speak to yourself.
- Recognize that how things look on the outside doesn’t determine how things will end. Although we can’t control everything we often have the ability to influence how much happiness or suffering the events of our lives bring us.
This week, I challenge you to take it easy on yourself but recognize when the choices you make are having a negative impact on your life so you can work to change things for the better.
Thanks for reading, Be Blessed & Stay Humble. Feedback is always appreciated. Interested in checking out my first two self-published books? Head over to my site: $elf – choose you always.