The Mind

Swift, fast, blinding
My mind’s the turn tables
And my thoughts they do the rhyming
Spinning, screeching, spinning, never stopping
Overwhelming me I’m far out in the deep end
Is it me or am I drowning or maybe I’m dreaming but I can’t swim
Will I drown or will I learn
Will I crash or will I burn?
Will I save myself or blame myself
Let these thoughts bring me down or rise above
Overwhelmed
Make it, break it, or take it?
Beat the odds and make it
Be the odds and break it
Or f*ck the odds and take it because this feeling I can’t shake it destined to be more than your definition of greatness
Feeling wait listed because the wait ain’t all that great
My minds producing the music making me quiver making me shake
I feel like I’m in a deep sleep but really I’m awake
What do I do now.. do I accelerate or brake, edit that part, throw this in or do I backspace delete that and erase?
There’s no telling so I’m life sailing
the waters getting deeper but to me there’s no failing
Push harder, go harder, work harder
Life has it’s downfalls
The goal is only to go further
Living in the here and now my thoughts are deep but God willing they won’t make me drown
Staying above sea level is a struggle and with each struggle I come out stronger and encouraged
Fighting this battle we call life and
To ensure you come out on top
first and foremost get your mind right….

Thanks for reading, Be Blessed & Stay Humble.

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Submerged

Submerged in my thoughts fighting a demon I never knew was there
My thoughts take over and I turn into a different person
Angered and outraged eyes ablaze like a fire has been ignited
No water no extinguisher no liquid can put out my solid thoughts
Maybe they’re permanent
Maybe they have a mind of their own
They control me
I think maybe they are out to get me
They leave me lifeless with no guard to save me
Fires ablaze and there’s no escaping
Fall victim to a concept fall victim to a thought
Fall victim to an emotion
Damn I’m starting think it’s my fault
Can’t blame them can’t blame him can’t blame her
I’m at the finish line but there was never a start
Playing hide and seek with my feelings playing tag with my heart play fighting with my thoughts so I throw them all in a vault
Punch a hole through a wall so I can see from a different view
I see them all standing around asking if its really you
They point fingers and throw jabs I stand back trying to suppress a laugh as I grab a fragile heart that I thought was mines
Examine it from different angles only to find out its not alive
It doesn’t beat at the pace that it should.. try to shake it to get it started but it’s bruised
Bruised from the past and from the pain that its endured
I yell scream and push I try to tell you to move
The past has its hands around the noose that its tying
I envision bad things its like I’m dying, but I’m trying
I step further back and there you are just standing still
It’s not my heart that I’m holding but it’s yours and now I’m frantic
I’m pacing back and forth trying to control my growing thoughts but I’m slowly starting to panic
I try to grasp what’s going on but I can’t because I’m stuck
It’s like my feet are glued to this place and I keep telling you to start
The past is weighing its toll on me but its because your standing in the doorway
You’re stuck between the now and then and the affects are pulling you down
I yell and scream and roll but the fire has spread around
I’m standing in the midst of it trying to get you to notice me
You hear bits and pieces but its like you’re purposely ignoring me
I feel for you
I hurt for you
But you won’t tell me what’s hurting you
I can’t make you see if you choose  to dim the light on me
Fighting a battle that isn’t mine but God has taken it away from me
For its not my battle and it’s not yours
You have the option and the ability to confront the past face to face and tell them to give back what’s yours
And if you can’t, stand to the side and let me help you close the door
The bad thoughts the bickering the unforeseen demons
They’ll do whatever it takes to steal the joy that’s yours for receiving
I reevaluate my own life to fix my own faults
But I can’t make it far to help you because you stop me where I start.

Thanks for reading, Be Blessed & Stay Humble.

Him

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It’s amazing, the way you make me feel
I can’t explain it, I wish I could bottle up this feeling and contain it
Put in my pocket for entertainment
I love it, I love you
No words could ever express …
how I fell, how I’m still falling for you
I want to get lost in your eyes
I want you to get lost in my thighs
Lets become one
I want to be next to you when the clouds roam beneath the sun
lets get lost in each other
Lets get lost in the covers
Read me a line from your favorite book
Intrigue me with your deep conversation
Turn me on with your intelligence
Open me up make me use my head until its evident…
Evident that the knowledge is flowing from my body
You’re a work of art and your body is my canvas
I’m painting you a picture of my boundless gratitude
I’ll wrap you like a gift just so I can unwrap you
Tell me that I’m yours and no one else’s
Cause you’re mines and only mines shit call me selfish
I could stare at you for an eternity for your smile lights up my world
Your voice it keeps me warm
And your touch could cause a storm
I close my eyes and I see you, even with my eyes open you’re still there, you invade my dreams, you interrupt my thoughts
I can’t help that I’m falling, I fall harder each hour, minute, second of the day
Its Un fathomable its unimaginable
Im looking for the ground but I haven’t found it
What is this feeling
What is this feeling
My heart is pounding
My heart is racing
In my mind I’m running but in reality I’m just pacing…
when I love, I love hard ..
You, You unraveled me
There’s no going back I lost touch with gravity
I’m Floating on cloud nine
This feeling is like a high
If I reach high enough I think I could touch the sky
You touch me with your words, verbs .. literally
You got me, you win
If you ever walk away then …
I guess that’s The End
Tell me what more can I do or say
These words exit my Brain and permanently engrave themselves on my skin
Open book with jumbled words you are the ink within my pen
Look at me with fire and I’ll look at you with desire and whisper to you slowly that it’s my love that you’ll acquire
Kiss me hard and my limbs won’t cooperate
The way my body’s trembling its losing the control to functionally operate
Losing my mind I’m going insane my body’s the runway and yours is the plane
You speed me up to slow me down overwhelmed by the feeling
Is it possible to drown
I’m drowning in this love and anticipating the making
oooh baby take my hand and feel my pulse my heart is racing
Look me in my eyes invade my space no separation
Tell me I make you feel good, no sexual interpretation
My love runs deep just use your imagination
This is only a snippet of my ongoing presentation.

Thanks for reading, Be Humble and Stay Blessed.

What do you do?

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breyanaijae.com

depressed-depression-girl-hate-head-favim-com-111281_largeThere are days where people become dark and days where people shut the world out. What do you do when those days become your life, when you’re sitting in your room thinking about all the bad things that have happened and how your life is at a standstill and you feel stuck in a rut and like nothing is going your way? What do you do? What do you do when it’s come to the point where you’re faking a smile and pretending to be happy for the sake of everyone else. You don’t want to explain what’s wrong because your emotions are all over the place and you don’t know where to begin. You feel like no one cares and like you’re talking to a wall. What do you do when you’re filled with darkness and you just want to sleep your pain away. You just want life to pass you by while you sit and feel sorry for yourself. You want to sit alone in the dark, drown yourself in your music and cry yourself to sleep. You want to wake up in the morning look in the mirror and remember the things you wanted to forget. What do you do? What do you do when your days become the same and the feeling is only pain? Do you give up or give in? What do you when you’ve lost the motivation and energy to get by each day? What do you do when your inner demons attack you and leave you so broken you don’t know what to do?

I’ll tell you. It isn’t easy to drag yourself out of a deep state of depression. It isn’t easy to tell yourself that things will eventually get better. Sometimes the anger and the pain gets the best of us but no matter what you’re going through pain is only temporary if you allow it to be. Stop sitting around feeling sorry for yourself and make something out of nothing. No one can help you if you make it hard for them to get through to you. No one can read minds and you can’t expect for them to know what’s going on. Don’t let your thoughts eat you alive. Whatever it is that you’re going through it will get better in time trust and believe that, just think positive and stop letting the negative outweigh the good. Especially if you’re young, you have your whole life to live, stop letting little things stress you and if nothing is going your way it’s because something bigger and better is in store for you in the long run. Be patient, have faith and believe that the misery won’t last forever. I know having someone tell you that things will get better will not change anything but you are in charge of how you think feel and react to whatever curve ball life may throw at you. Just don’t give up too easily put up a fight and try your hardest, if you can’t do it alone confide in your support system or find it in yourself to get through it but living life isn’t easy and everyone knows that.

Thanks for reading, Be Blessed & Stay Humble.

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Wherever You Are, Know That God Has Put You There For A Reason

…an angel of the Lord appeared to him in a dream. ‘Joseph, son of David,’ the angel said, ‘do not be afraid to take Mary as your wife. For the child within her was conceived by the Holy Spirit.’ (Matthew 1:20, NLT.)

Have you ever felt overwhelmed or even afraid of what God has called you to do? Maybe you were pursuing a dream or goal and things didn’t turn out the way you planned. Joseph had planned to take Mary as his wife, but when he found out she was pregnant, he didn’t know what to think. He was afraid that he might be making a mistake because things didn’t turn out the way he planned. But, God sent a messenger in a dream to reassure Joseph that he was on the right path.

Today let me reassure you that God knows right where you are, and He knows how to get you to where you need to be. Even when things don’t go the way you planned, His hand is on you. Do not be afraid. Trust that God is working behind the scenes on your behalf, and that He will lead you into the life of blessing that He has prepared for you.

Prayer for Today:

Father in heaven, I choose to trust in You. Even when things don’t go the way I planned, I know You are at work in my life. Thank You for Your perfect love which casts out all fear. I love You and surrender every area of my life to You in Jesus’ name. Amen. (spiritualinspiration)

I don’t consider myself to be a deeply religious person, I don’t go around forcing Christianity on people but I do believe in God. There are times when I feel down and like I’m stuck at a standstill in life but I sit and reevaluate everything; all the things that I’ve been through and all the things that I have planned. There were some things that didn’t go as I had hoped but I didn’t lose faith, I know that God has me under his wing and I trust that he will lead me in the right direction. You may not be at the happiest point in your life but things will get better if you believe it will. If you sit around having the mindset that things will only get worse then things will only get worse. You make a choice every second of your life so choose wisely. Stay positive because when you think positive, positive things will begin to take place.

Today, I challenge you to speak nothing but good into your life. Focus on all that’s going good and have faith that things will get better. Remember, your current destination is never your final and you have the power to take control over your thoughts and change your life.

You can take control over your life by changing your thoughts. That includes:

  • Practicing Mindfulness
  • Knowing Your Triggers
  • Writing it out
  • Positive affirmations – change “I can’t” to “I can”.
  • Count your joy and blessings – be grateful for what you do have.
  • Focus on progress, not perfection.

Thanks for reading, Be Blessed and Stay Humble.

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